Hey Eric Mangini…
Tell-a-friend • Patriots • Football • Random Shit
GFY!
Hey, you reap what you and a broken down greybearded QB fahkin’ sow, Fredo.
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Hey Eric Mangini…Posted by Fitzy on 12/29/08 at 09:50 AM
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GFY! It’s the Townie News Happy Hollydaze Ten Dollar T-Shirt Saletacular, Charlie Brown!Posted by Fitzy on 12/15/08 at 09:00 AM
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YAZ = Birth Control?Posted by Fitzy on 11/19/08 at 09:50 AM
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Umm...there's a birth control pill named after one of the greatest Red Sox ever?
Shouldn't any pill named YAZ give you a 72-hour stiffy or help get women pregnant with a single glance or help you grow a temporary 2nd dick in case tonight's the night you get that long-coveted threesome? But birth control? F U pharmaceutical world! Name it SCHIRALDI or BOGGS or SAMBITO or someone else just not so historicallly awesome. Someone NOT named Yaz, for chrissakes!
One sweet southpaw swing from Yaz and women within miles would find themselves...NOT pregnant. WTF? Booze + Sharpies x Facebook = YOU’RE FIRED!Posted by Fitzy on 11/05/08 at 02:36 PM
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Tell-a-friend • Patriots • Football • Random Shit
Former barely-legal Pats cheerleader Caitlin Davis seen here working on her Sharpie technique. What a nitwit.
Well, there goes everyone's favorite Pats cheerlita (cheerleader + Lolita). If you haven't read about what Caitlin Davis did to her friend's face, and why she got Das Boot from the team, well, you should (thanks to WithLeather on this shit). This goes back to Fitzy's Online Rule #35: When you do something funny that's wrong don't fahkin' put pictures of it on Facebook, especially when you work for the Patriots!
Also for what it's worth I'd like to let Caitlin know that Townie News and Team Fitzy happen to have openings for a Sharpie Artist as well as an Official Cheerleader, so Caitlin, you've know, if you get this...lord knows you've got time on your hands now. And probably some purple Sharpie marks. You Win, TFB. You Win.Posted by Fitzy on 10/25/08 at 02:06 PM
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Tell-a-friend • Patriots • Football • Random Shit
Here, I think a water-free bath will help your knee, TFB. Come to your barely-clad Brazilian mama.
Well, more visual evidence of why even in injured absence and semi-infected distress tom Brady is the King of Everything can be found at my favorite sites, What Would Tyler Durden Do (wwtdd.com). I don't know when these pictures were taken, but Lords of Light! How did the photographer keep the camera straight, or find focus? To make your day better, or a better day the best, CLICK HERE.
Then, if you aren't already in an ice bath (in the tub Gisele occupies in the picture above), or under a cold shower, feel free to check out Egotastic's bonus pics of Mrs. TFB from American Photo magazine. Again, ALL REALLY TERRIBLE AND UGLY AND UN-LOOK-AT-ABLE.
From what we hear TFB's knee is getting better. Once we get the "All Clear!" on that then you'll probably feel a stiff breeze behind you. That will be the giant, collective sigh of relief from all Pats fans and Tom Brady ManCrushers alike.
Now let's go Pats!
Even in Defeat…Posted by Fitzy on 10/22/08 at 07:49 AM
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Tell-a-friend • Red Sox • Baseball • Random Shit Red Sox Nation finds winners. It works out like this (still funny days later)...
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Long live rivalry. And Sox fans who taunt hotheaded Yankee relievers so much they flee titty bars in a drunken huff and get pulled over on a DUI. In NEBRASKA. Cheers and Beers, Bob RyanPosted by Fitzy on 10/21/08 at 09:52 AM
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Tell-a-friend • Red Sox • Baseball • Random Shit
Leave it to my favorite Boston sports writer, Bob Ryan, to put the series and season into the perfect perspective.
I hope all you bums, who must feel a little better after the Pats played HULK SMASH! with the Denver Ponies Monday night, read this and feel OK about it all too.
Cheers and beers, Bob. My, how I'd love to buy you a few and hear some stories.
Question of the Day: Is a Bob Ryan ManCrush acceptable? Please Stand By…Posted by Fitzy on 10/16/08 at 05:27 PM
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Tell-a-friend • Red Sox • Random Shit We are experiencing technical difficulties at Townie News. Some of you may think this to be an excuse, that old Mr. Boston Sportspants here can't stand to be front and center, standing by his words and videos and idiocy, what with the Pats getting big wins their sacks grilled out west, and the Sox kicking ass on the brink, playing terrific like dick salad at home in the ALCS. Yeah, 'cuz I'm sure I don't have much to say in the face of all this madness! That's like saying, "Fitzy always can resist himself when someone offers him a free beer, or beers. Or a slice of pizza. Or a hooker." Those of you that know me are well aware that this was to be a week of massive vloggage and bloggage and rantage and ravingsage. BUT, the powers that be on the tech side of shit had some troubles (like the Sox pitching - alright, enough friggin' parallels!) Short and not so sweet of it is we're having problemos, and we'll be back up as soon as you can say, "O-fahkin'K, here we go Sox, back to Tampa it is!" Or so I hope. GFY, let's go Sox, in Dice K we trust (sweating...fingers crossed...eyes closed...beer shaking...) The Iron Sheik is My Hero and Should Be Yours TooPosted by Fitzy on 10/08/08 at 11:00 AM
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