As I make my way into the heart of darkness that is outside Radio City Music Hall today, where I anticipate a lot of football-busting tonight with Giants, Jets and so much other untamed fankind, I thought perhaps a quick look back on all the videos we’ve made over the years might be a good time. Or at least a chance to not think about the Bruins getting knocked out in the 1st round, or how shitty the Sox bullpen is. Plus it gives me a chance to re-watch and try not to repeat jokes! So enjoy, and GFY. Videos reposted in chronological order. And if the word “chronological” is too big for you then you’re my target audience, so thanks for stopping by.
...a bunch of fahkin’ videos I hope I never have to make again. But first...
Ladies and Gentlefriends, Patsfans and Patriot Peoples the world over, it gives me great pleasure to present a video I was dying to make. A video I couldn’t wait to make, especially given the match-up. Here is our Super Bowl 46 Wicked Pissah Webcast, in all it’s inappropriate and NSFW glory.
Now, one video I wouldn’t have minded making again, albeit a contemporary version, is this, where as a full-fledged unapologetic Patriots Supahfan I make my way from tailgate lot to stadium in Indianapolis to represent for my Foxboro Football Folk. For all the positive press Indy is getting this week for hosting a great Super Bowl party I have to say I’m hearing that Pats fans are getting some serious fahkin’ stinkeye, and I can attest that Indy was mighty mighty hostile to Patspeeps. See for yourself...
NOW, two fahkin’ videos I hope to never ever have to make again (seriously - much rather get hit with a paintball gun full of frozen Whoppers) are these, and I don’t give a flying fiddler’s fuckwhistle how funny you might think I am/can be when depressed or in defeat. FAHK THAT NOIZ!!! First was when I was surprised by being on-stage with none other than starting Giants O-lineman David Diehl ("Here’s the Diehl - GO FAHK YASELF!") in NYC. He was a good sport, but still...I don’t wanna be there, or in this situation again. I’d rather hang out with the actual Situation. And he’s a douchemountain!
And then this...what some call my best webcast ever. A video that many, no bullsheet, have told me in-person, was the first thing that made them smile after the football game that supposedly happened in the desert 4 years ago. Something I did because I had to, but hope to holy hotcakes, I never have to make again. I seriously would rather spend 28 days in Aretha Franklin’s dutch oven than have to even consider making another something like this.
Pats, I want you to win because I am a fan. And it would be wonderful to shut everyone the fahk up who hates on you and is 31 flavors of jealous. Oh, and Giants fans too! We kinda owe them a little bit. Anyway...just win, baby. Because if you do you’ll be Super Bowl champs. And we’ll all be so proud and overjoyed. And as a tiny tiny tiny footnote, and treat for me, I’ll never have to make those videos again. Thank you. Go Pats. And everyone who doesn’t root for them or is oping I have to make another Defeatcast can Go Fahk Yourself.
Sorry for not blogging this week. We’ve ben doing stuff and you’ve been watching and reading and enjoying, I hope, but jst to get it out of the fahkin;’ way, INSERT TYPICAL FITZY EXCUSE ABOUT NOT BLOGGING ENOUGH HERE AND PROMISING TO DO MORE SOON AND OFTEN AND STUFF. NOW! To the matter at handjob...GRONKMANIA. Shitsticks on fire, it ontinues to sweep Patriot and our actual Nation like crazy. And as it takes vice-like grip on the country’s dicks you try to remember when the last time somebody with this much accidental charisma, charm, ability and goofiness tok hold. GRONK runs the world right now. And this is a hobbled Gronk with a bad ankle. Or “the Gronkle” as we call it. I just don’t wanna hear any more about his Gronkle. I want game! But, if I have to hear more abut Gronk and the Gronkle leading up to Sunday then it may at least be in the musical entertainment type form, right? If you think people with TV cameras, radios, microphones, blogs and wieners have gone out of their Gronkin’ mind, then you should check out the Youtubes. Literally a new Gronk Song (and I’m surprised that Cisqo hasn’t remixed “The Thong Song” into “The Gronk Song” yet...wait, that may be a brilliant idea). Anyway, check it...we got GRONK songs galore, baby. There’s the homemade kinds done up right, like the Twisted Sister tribute (which always scores points with my retro soul when you pay homage to the great Dee Fahkin’ Snyder), I WANNA GRONK
And then we have celebrity DJ hip-hop star fans like Timbaland (tell me you didn’t double-take when you heard Timbaland was a Pats fan and wrote a song for Gronk) who dial up this GRONK SONG
And yet another professional entry by a hip-hopper (I dunno what the kids are calling them these days) by the name of Fewcha, who Gronks it like it’s hot...
And then we have the shortest, simplest and easiest to love, the Toucher and Rich “Party Gronk” song, which in many ways is almost kind of an anthem at this point. He is party. YO SOY FIESTA (how many times have you dropped that line in the last 10 days? At least five times a day, minimum, right?)
Am I missing any? If so hit me up -
And BTFW, I have no effing idea, and I bet you don’t either, as to ht Gronk means when he says “We going to the ship”. And you know what? I DON’T CARE. I kinda don’t ever wanna know. It’s like the lyrics to “Louis Louie”. Nobody really knows what they mean, and they definitely mean a lot of different things to a lot of different people. And that’s how it should be.
In non-Gronk related matters...
I’ll be making my return to The Karlson & McKenzie Show on WZLX Thursday morning @ 7:35am. Been a while since I’ve been on with the big dudes, the big boobs and big head. Can’t wait! And then we’ll follow that up with our weekly sports chat with Funfella and The Grump (aka Bax and O’Brien) on Rock 102 @ 8am. If you tune in to both there’s an 80% chance you’ll hear some of the same ridiculous things/lines/jokes twice. Double your fahkin’ pleasure!
Hope you’ve enjoyed the videos we’ve made within the last week. More to come soon, including the Super Bowl 46 Wicked Pissah Webcast, which should drop sometime Thursday afternoon. And it’ll be as epic as the game we’ve been obsessing over for the last ten days. I think. I hope! Etc...
...and here’s everything else Patstastic and such we can think of for you to watch, read, look at, enjoy and whatever else you gotta do before kickoff.
CelticsPatriotsMan has a pretty sweet little...preview of today’s showdown.
And then we got all these...there’s GFY pal and middle-finger flippin’ stalwart Bugsy Segal finally showing a sign of approval to a license plate...and how!
Then we got Chad Lakkas (@themadgamer), who whipped up this sign for the stands so his aunt could see him at the game Sunday (dood...I would SO download this app and play the shit outta this game...hope the Pats do to Sunday).
Then we got this sweetass GRONK cartoon / illustration by Neil Smith (starting to get an idea how big New England’s Gronk-boner is at this point?)
Then we got my boy Hanzy, who always whips up the best gameday outfits for The Razor. Here was last week’s for The Tebowl 2...can’t effing wait to see what he devises for the Championship.
WEEI kinda nailed it; we need Big Vince to come hungry and dine on stuffed Raven today.
And as we head into it, and the game we’ve somehow waited a week for is nigh, remember 2 things; no matter what happens, like Jen Hill does here, KEEP CALM AND BRADY ON.
And be sure to say a coupla OUR BRADYs before kickoff (as presented by our pal Jeremiah Lucas).
So there it is and here we go. Nothing else need be said. GAME. EFFING ON. Hang ‘em high and let ‘em fly, boys. GFY, Ravens. LET’S GO PATS!!!
.jpg)
.jpeg)
.jpg)
.jpeg)